meat+ruby+rabbit+money+buterfly+panic+cake

Yesterday I realized that I’m running out of time in a BIG way. Today it turns out i’m also running out of money… The wonderful term “international student” has once again given me a massive headache. I’m moving house in a few weeks, and because i am unable to find a guarantor in England I have to pay a full 6 month of rent in advanced, in the next week or so, I have some money lying around but i’m around £849 low, hopefully my bank will be able to give me an overdraft for some of that, if not then i am fucked… After running around in a circle for a while (in panic) i realized that once i pay the rent and the fees and deposit and whatnot, i wont actually have any money left to print my exhibition stuff, my exhibition stuff that I have to print pretty much right now… Brilliant isnt it. I ran back and forth to stockwell twise today and still nothing is certain. Great fun really… ANYWAY, While dealing with everything I also have a gazillion other things to do, among them the big print that I might not even have money for in the end (Yey!) But its coming along nicely.. this is what it looks like now :

meatnearlyI’m gonna do something about the flat pink between the flowers and the meat, and also i might add some more butterflies, and probably repeat some of the drawing in the white space in the center, I’m pretty pleased with the look tho and i think blown up all over the wall it should be pretty cool. I’m might do something with the background but not sure yet… only have a week to figure it out tho. I need some cake now!

I think I’m getting worse at this.

I keep forgetting to blog, and to do what i am suppose to do, my brain is mushy and my priorities a bit all over the place. And this cold isnt helping! Anyway, thought i should just do a big catchup post.

I was suppose to send Andy my project question thigy on friday, i remembered on sunday… still havnt done it yet. Mostly cuz i dont know what it is. I wrote down some stuff, and i think its something to do with how can i use aesthetic tools to create beauty, or something lame like that, but i dont know, im rubbish at this stuff. I’m gonna work on my proposal today so something might come out of that. Hopefully.

The website is up and running now, still has a few bits and bobs that needs sorting out but i’m really pleased with it this far. This is what it looks like at the moment:

Picture 4As it is now whatever you enter stays in the submission box, making it really easy to enter the same thing over and over again (as someone has done with “life” and “apathy”.  I’m not really sure if its a good thing or not, it makes it easy for someone to make a statement of something they feel strongly about, but im not sure if everyone knows exactly how the system works. I dont want to moderate the site in anyway, so i might just leave it like it is. If someone want to put “penis” in 2000 times then they are welcome to do that, but i might make it a bit harder to do that… maybe. Ok so thats the website stuff done.

I got some books the other week and im reading them slowly, “six names of beauty” is really interesting but not really what i’m looking for, it’s a bit random. I did go and pick up all my books from Farnham last weekend tho, so my bibliography is growing, along with the books i have mentioned earlyer there is also a boog on garbage, and one about shock art and some other stuff, ill try and get in to them soon!I think my research paper will be about like what space beauty holds in contemporary  art (way to broad tho) but its interesting reading about it, how beauty used to be the main kind of goal in art and now its just a side note (im not really sure what im on about but im sure i will have sooner or later).

As for the norway exhibition thing im still in a bit of a panic about funding and stuff but im also really excited! Tone, the curator, is working on the catalogue now and i found out we will have student studying contemporary art actually helping us setting up the show MINIONS!!! HAHA!

I’ve been working on the big wall piece for a while now and this is what it looks like atm:

meatrabbittest

Its mainly meat and rabbits, with a few rubies and butterflies, I have a few more changes to make and next i need to work on the background and the drawing. Lately i have been drawing a lot with pens but i think the pieces where i use pencil are a bit more effective. They look like they are drawn straight on the paper instead of being digitally added (even tho thats what they are). I’m really looking forward to getting this done but i’m worried about the printing, because of the size of the wall it as to be printed in 4 pieces and placed next to each-other. The other prints will be hanging off the walls with butterfly clips (most lightly) i think it adds a new dimension hanging them like that, they become less precious and it plays with some of the works almost religious looks (the symmetry and  cross shapes)… But with the big print they need to be connected somehow… ugh, ill think about it later. I have about a week to finish this and prepare the rest of the work for print! I didnt realize i ha so little time till now… Heres that panicky feeling again 😦

Ok have to work now, no gradate fair for me!

biscuits and no tea

I’m having biscuits but no tea, dont have time. Just thought i’d do a quick blog before i head off to work.

Ugh work, thats my main problem at the moment, finding a balance between uni, work and exhibition. I’m doing two days a week at work now, then i have two days at uni a week and sunday is off day (am i allowed to have an off day?), leaving monday and friday to do some work but i am way to easily distracted… and most evenings i’m asleep just after dinner.

I was gonna scan some drawings in today but only have ten min till i have to leave for work so hopefully tomorrow morning.

Some good news tho, i went to Farnham on sunday and picked up my books (hurrah!) so now i almost have a bibliography for my proposal, i dont have a question tho… ops. Somethign to do with beauty and disgust i guess, does beauty have a place in contemporary art or something lame like that,  but i wanna talk about the disgusting bits too, so i really have no idea. anyhoo

on our way back from Farnham we went on a spontaneous visit to Hampton Court Palace, pretty impressive stuff. I took some photos but running out of time, so here is just one awesome photo, the wall is covered with guns and swords, its pretty crazy!

ok work now 😦

All the things i should be doing

I am a master of procrastination…

in a week my funding application for my exhibition in norway is due, but instead of filling it out im looking at my classmates blogs, and while i was doing that i realized that i should be reading books now, researching, but i cant because i need to fill in this form, in order to fill in the form i need to email the curator, but i am suppose to send her my artist statement, so i cant email her until i have finished the statement, i was gonna do that last week but i probably found something else that i should have been doing. I need to eat breakfast now, i might skip the lecture today, i dont have time, i have to go to work tomorrow, saturday and tuesday, im even avoiding eating breakfast now, thinking that if i dont get up, time wont pass.

I’m 6 days in to my MA degree and the initial reaction is PANIC!!!!

I think I’ve mentioned it already but I’m finding this blogging stuff really hard! I have no problem writing about what I had for dinner or some bit of art that I find really interesting, but writing about my work is impossible, its like a wall in my brain (possibly put in there by Darren Brown) and it stops me from actually writing anything substantial… must break threw wall…

Ok, so here is like a brief outline of my practice, my project and my interests:

I’m a print maker I guess… but I’m not, I just make things that can be printed. I take photos sometimes but I’m no a photographer, its just how I make stuff sometimes… I’m not a painter, but I thought I was once. I draw. Sometimes I draw with pens and pencils and sometimes with pictures of meat or with dried beans.

I like objects and images that are both disgusting and beautiful at the same time, and that what I want my work to look like. I want people to discover more and more little things in the pieces as the look at them closer. I like things that contradict themselves, like toy guns, or taxidermy butterflies.

My project is pretty simple: I wanna make my work move. I wanna create some sort of multi screen animation on a loop that slowly and organically changes and grows, eventually starting up where it started. I want it to be big, overwhelming, beautiful and maybe a bit disgusting. How I’m gonna do this I have no idea.

I love the idea of not only digitally mirroring the work as I have done but also physically doing it, to give the effect of something very, very large.

My main concern about my project is feeding the theoretical side and the research paper I have to write, I have, I guess, something to work with, but I really cant imagine any kind of all important question that needs answering. Maybe I’ll look in to aesthetics, but it’s such a massively large subject area…

The mail reason for my panic has to do with this very large, very exciting group exhibition I am taking part in back home in Norway… I’m gonna be showing something like 10 – 18 pieces of work, some of witch are not done yet, one is 3 x 4 meter and none are printed… and it opens on November the 21st (thus the panic).

My project… sort of.

I’ve been dreading writing about my project all weekend… but I guess I have too.

Right, so the basic idea is that i wanna further develop my current practise. I make digital prints by mixing hand drawing, photography and digital image collaging. Now I’d like to move away from digital print and towards moving image and installation. Instead of being printed on paper i want my work to be displayed on screens (Proper nice HD screens would be cool).

God, I’m really not enjoying writing about this… ok…

So, i wanna create movement in my work, more like a kind of natural organic growth, like something changing slowly while you look at it, subtle movements… I like the idea of the movements being being never ending, like a big loop.  I love the idea of creating something massive, that fills your whole field of view.

I’m gonna pop some images and stuff up that im interested in and that inspire me, and hopefully i should be able to express my self better next time.

Ina